Texas Twanged

Man I'm on the set like the flicks so let your parents flash
A splash bigger than whales, I'm makin monsters mash...

PROPS and DROPS from this weekend's Longhorn throttling of the Buffs and the Broncos' defensive stand versus the Bucs:

DROPS: Carmelo Anthony was on hand as a guest of the AD to be honored along with other Colorado Olympians at halftime. How does he respond? By standing on the Texas sideline and hamming it up with them. Worse yet, JR Smith came along with him and was rocking a Texas pullover that prompted former two time Slushy Gutter Winner Mummy to simply say "fuck him. Seriously, fuck him." You can't blame the pair, that's the closest they'll see a real defense all year.

PROPS: The Donk DL came up big in the game, holding the Buc D to their lowest output of the season. Contrary to popular belief, the Tampa offense is pretty damn good. They were ranked top five coming into the game and RB Ernest Graham is a beast. The big hosses up front stymied the running game with just shear power and an interesting mix of stunts and blitzes. Perhaps the only pass rush downer was Champ Bailey knocking Brian Griese out of the game, bringing in the more mobile Jeff Garcia.

DROPS: Aric Goodman had the trifecta of missed kicks in the first half. None was exactly Jason Elam 64 yard difficulty either. Goodman has gone from the hero versus WVU (but if you look at that kick, he even hit that crappy, 10 yards back and it would've been a shank) to missing his last four kicks. Somewhere Mason Crosby is weeping. Goodman appears to be one of the most confident players on the team, but as soon as crunch time appears, he loses it.

PROPS: The CU defense was pretty formidable at times. They got to UT QB Colt McCoy four times and pressured him on numerous occasions.The Linebackers had impressive stats, but gave up the big plays over the middle and RAC to the Longhorn RBs. Safety Anthony Perkins saw extened time in the backfield as he again replaced an injured starter. He responded well with some solid defense and pass coverage. Big George Hypolite has commanded double teams and allowed the ends to get some dap. True frosh Curtis Cunningham is also on an the upswing.

DROPS: Someone tell Marcus Thomas that he isn’t Emmitt Smith. Thomas had a chance to put the offense in perfect position to punch in a TD in the red zone after an impressive zone blitz interception. However, delusions of rambling 20+ yards for a score filled his head and the ball was promptly punched out of his hands and recovered again by the Bucs. We know down lineman dream of crossing the goal line, but never has the chants of “just go down” resonated throughout the stadium and across living rooms everywhere.

PROPS: Bronco K Matt Prater continues to defy aholes like Commish CH who were skeptical of his selection as placekicker. Prater has only missed one FG all year and is booming the long ones. His 55 yarder yesterday was just crushed and could’ve been good from 65 yards.

DROPS: For the second straight week Cody Hawkins had an abyssmal game. Yet it is hard to have any sembelance of quarterbacking ability when you have Longhorns in your face all evening. The patchwork OL never allowed Hawkins to get in a groove and seven of his passes were batted down. That's not a height thing either, detractors, Manute Bol would've had those knocked off. And as always, the backup QB is the most popular guy on the team. But unless the backup is Peyton Manning, the team will stick with Cody.