Used To Call Me Fatso

Denver has had its fair share of ‘Fat’ people come through the 303 (and/or 720, because we always seem to forget about the 720 brothers) over the years. In honor of Fat Tuesday, let’s take a look:

-Fat Lever- Lost in the Magic point guard hype of the mid-80s was the Nuggets own PG, one Lafayette Lever, affectionately known as Fat. (I’ve tried for years to shorten Lafayette, Colorado to just ‘Fat’ but no one really get’s it.) Lean, quick, and playing long, Fat consistently had more triple doubles than his western conference Showtime counterpart. His rebounding prowess was perhaps one of the best that a true point has offered in the last 25 years.

-Brian Bohannon- Baseball players usually take the cake (pun intended) for being the most atheistically unappealing fatsos in the sports realm. The Rockies had their fair share over the years (Dante Bichette was no stranger to the buffets) but pitcher Brian Bohannon certainly was the most rotund. Dude looked more like a radiator salesman than a front line pitcher. Rumor was that he could not have a rosin bag because he mistook it for a bag of powdered sugar.

-Raymond Felton- Look, the guy was in the NBA and plays at a fast level, but he’s still got one of those faces that look if you take a pin to it, you’ll get 30 seconds of deflation.

-Wade Phillips- Colorado’s coaches over the last 30 years have been the thin variety- Shanny, Jim Tracy, Dan Reeves, Bob Hartley, Dan Issel. Even the bigger dudes are just that: big husky dudes. John Fox, George Karl, even Don Baylor, who most resembled Grimace the McDonald’s shake character. Not Donks’ coach Wade Phillips though, he was of the overweight variety. Slap a key ring on that guy and you have the high school maintenance man.

-Mike Horan- He was actually very skinny; but tell me that mustache and weird perm he had rocking wasn’t creepy even back then. Exact type of dude who’d be rolling Bourbon Street chanting “show me your t*ts!”

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